Re*al*i*za*tion: the instance or result of realizing.

I have a habit of giving great advice. I'm logical with a spoonful of emotion and I love to take things from all sides when making my decisions and thus giving my fantastic advice. I also have a habit of not listening to this exact same instinct that guides that advice. Ignore the little voice screaming warnings and the tap on my shoulder for Little Miss You Should Know Better (madre to Little Miss Ut-Oh).

Unfortunately I've done it again. I've ignored the glaring obvious and tried to pin my thoughts on our little friend Hope. I knew the truth (well I guess it's what I expect is the truth) and I sat around and convinced myself that he was shy or that something about me/us is just difficult for him to deal with (not that I ever make things easy)... today I told 2 of my best friends that I've come to the decision to just drop it because I keep thinking about it. And of course that's what I go to bed thinking of. So I wake up in a rush this morning having had this horrible dream in which I woke up with the sudden realization that I wasn't doing anything more than spoon feeding myself a wish.

I kept thinking that perhaps as his age grew so did some semblance of maturity but then I realized the advice I'd give anybody else.... he showed who he was back then and as Coolio once said- "ain't a damn thing changed but only the year."