No tricks just treats!

Hope everybody had a fabulous halloween...

I realized today that while my blog's main purpose was to make my snide and sarcastic remarks about the general state of relationships and dating I don't actually share any of the dating I do. Mostly because I don't do it lol. But I think things are starting to pick up a bit after meeting Mr. D (not that kinda d!) and the re-introduction of Terence.

So I'll give you a teaser as we plunge into this the next few weeks:

Mr. D. Met him tonight (yes tonight lol) at the club. I don't normally give my numbers to guys I meet at the club and by don't normally I mean never unless you throw the party and I need the hookup. He however was very polite, VERY cute, and from outward appearances seemed to have his sh!t together. And he was dressed like Carlton- who doesn't love Carlton? So he sends me a text after the club to let him know that I've gotten home safely. And when I let him know? He quickly hit me back to say that he wants to take me out this week wherever I wanna go. Ladies and Gents- I think we have a pledge :)

Finally Terence, won't go into too much because I think I addressed it in a previous post. But lately he's been pouring (more like soaking me) on the hints about how he's interested in being a pledge (in my dating sorority of course!). In addition to the other day, he makes little comments that warrant a different kinda pause and actually make me feel uncomfortable. I know that he's a sensitive soul, he just hasn't really been the most sensitive with me, so when does the sensitive thing it gives me goose bumps. Anyhoo we've been having a lot of long conversations about life and how things have changed and we're making plans to do dinner next weekend so erum- this will just be something to see. I know a lot of my friends are either very excited to see what happens or hoping that I'll gather the strength to push him into the Atlantic.

So those are the two I'll try to keep yal updated on every once in a while...

Dry as the Desert...

Still no post. I'm going to try it tomorrow as I just finished my midterm two hours ago and I've been trying to figure out what to wear since I don't like my halloween costume. So I'm now in between a girl scout/mad men/ and susie from the rugrats. Susie is winning :) Anyhoo I found this funny and thought I'd share- Happy Halloween Folks!

Been a long time- shouldn't of left you...

It's been a WEEK since I've blogged last I feel kinda weird like I have untapped stores energy and emotions. Blame it on midterms- I've been swamped with exams, projects and PAPERS for the past two weeks so it's been rough. I promise I'll have a blog either tomorrow or saturday about interracial dating (which of COURSE I'm a fan of- otherwise I wouldn't exist!), til then I'll give you a cartoon that is pretty much a sneak peak into my current dating situation.

Title courtesy of Aaliyah "Try Again"

Double Donderdag*...

* Donderdag is Thursday in Afrikaans.

So I don't usually do doubles but since I've been awake til past 5 for the past 4 nights I figure I should write about what's been on my mind. I don't regret being single- sometimes I think that it's allowed me time to hankerdown and focus on me and figure out what I want and need from my future relationship(s). It allows me to work on being the best girlfriend that I can be because how do I love Little Mister Sunshine for who he is whilst I'm still trying to figure out who Little Miss Sunshine is? That being said, there are still some perks I miss...

* Forehead Kiss: Nothing says I love/like you like a forehead kiss. No matter how badly my day was going one of those always made me feel like all was going to be right in the world.

* Couples Vacays: The sun, the beach walks, the adventure and exploring, the kissing in the moonlight, the vacay she-bangbang...

* The Television Lap-Head Convo: Watching tv or even (sigh) a football game with your head rested comfortably in his lap is just... sigh almost makes me feel sensitive or something.

* Lame Dates: Even when the introductory magic is gone it's nice to have those lame cheesy dates that remind you of when he was still in the "impress her mode."

* Late Night Phone Calls: Gotta love that "you hang up" "no you hang up" "Okay we'll both hang up on the count of three..1.2.3." "wait are you still there?" "yeah I am..."

* Spooning: I used to hate cuddling but I will admit that there's something special about laying across a man's chest and hearing his heart beat or my favorite **gasp** snuggling up behind your man with your head in that little crook in his back and inhaling his cologne... (mini swoon)

*Forking: Well as we all know spooning leads to forking! Nothing like a good ole regular forking session.

Last but certainly not least...

Just being with that special someone! I really kinda miss having someone to talk to about any and everything. Someone who knew when I was freaking out even I was trying to hide it. Someone who I couldn't wait to find out about the minute details of their day... Someone I enjoyed making smile.

Okay okay- enough of the mushy gushy. Back to the real worlds with ya!

We Want Pre-Nup?

So before I start this blog (and even the intro to the blog) let em introduce Terence. A now acquaintance but former errr **bang buddy** for over three years, he was someone who made me want to tear my hair out, kick and scream, and possible bust the windows out of his car (if he had one) for the way that things went down b/n the two of us.. It was years full of lies, manipulation, general fuckery (on both sides) but alas- it's time to grow up in both age in maturity. ..

So anyhoo- he texted me the other day and after I decided to stop being rude to the loaded harmless questions he was asking, I decided to lay down exactly what it was that I would be an acceptable list of rules for us to continue with our burgeoning friendship. For me, establishing a baseline that was necessary for us to carry on kinda sparked a thought or two... can we draw up these same type of rules and regulations for successful relationships?

For instance, I jokingly made up a contract for sex buddies that I was saying I was going to ask everyone to sign.. a confidentiality and guideline for hook-ups that ensured the success of all parties involved. If I were to have a dating contract what would I include? I'll pick out five for right now because I don't think I could actually ever create one...

a) Check-Ins to discuss whether or not the relationship is useful to us (no clue how often)

b) A bare minimum of weekly swexy times...

c) No bitchassness... (if I don't call you every day please don't look at me like I'm suspect)

d) A date a week (we don't have to go anywhere but def some "just us time")

e) ... I've ran out of things. lol. I'll work on it.

What would you put on yours?

Title courtesy of Kanye West and Jamie Foxx's "Gold Digger"

Double Up On The Java

The only thing I hate worse than thinking about things when I'm awake...

Is being unable to sleep because these somethings/someones are implanted in your subconscious and it's FIVE THIRTY-NINE IN THE MORNING.... eff people and their trying to come back from the land of the dead!

Best I Ever Had?

I haven't had a long list of partners- in fact I don't even need a pair of hands to count them on but I don't think that means I'm inexperienced. I guess that really comes down to whether your consider quantity over quality or even your definition of 'quantity' (partners? amount of times doing the do?)...

This being said I can easily identify the all-stars and the one that needs to be benched for the rest of the season (i.e. LIFE). One of my guy friends protested my ability to make a ranking system of guys, some mumbo jumbo about being ethical and being the best "for the moment" - bah. But I think it's pretty universal that you can know whether or not a partner deserves a standing ovation or a razzie award. Now I can't say for sure that I can put an a-z ranking order on guys but I can tell you the valedictorian and the college drop out. And for guys who think this is unfair (I'm not going to say it's because you've been ranked at the bottom of the totem pole...) just think about what it means for your success. If Katie and Keesha hadn't heard about your skills from the streets do you still think you'd be getting those "thronx me tonight" text messages and honesty box posts? No. They know because somebody told them that you were good at what you do. On a biological note rankings exist for the same reason stereotypes do- your brain just can't take the information overload. So you brain categorizes to simplify and make life easier for yourself for future reference. Think about it, if you weren't able to mentally assign some score to your sexual partner would u know whether or not to have sex with them again? once again- nope. You should be thankful for that.

So if I need to call Tio for that spine re-aligning BBO or Kingston for his tear producing tongue skills than so be it- don't blame me, blame my evolutionary mental faculties.